I'm out of Town.

PEACE.

I'm SO Proud of my Young Readers

My daughter Madison is 9 years old. She is just about the most adorable, well behaved, and loving little girl in the world.

I wake up at 5AM every day and leave for work by 5:30 (I'm really not a morning person, so I usually shower the night before). It's a bit depressing sometimes, especially during the winter, how little sunlight I actually bear witness to.

Anyway the other day Madison asked me if I would please wake her up when I leave for work. Needless to say I was pretty surprised. When I asked her why she said that she wanted to get up early, before she had to start getting ready for school, because she wanted to have a little more time to read. Of course I quickly swallowed the lump in my throat and blinked away the tears that were threatening to well up behind my eyelids, but I told her of course I would.

She explained that her recent increase in her passion for reading was because she wants to finish the Harry Potter series before the final film is released. She said she wants to be able to compare the movies to the books the way her older sister, Kylie, and I do.

I can certainly relate to that.

Harry Potter was introduced to our family by my oldest daughter, Kylie. I mean I originally bought the books for her, but I assumed they were "kid's books" at the time and so I dismissed them as beneath me. Kylie showed me the error of my ways a few years later.

I'm not sure why it took so long to get Madison interested. Kylie had read all 7 books at least 3 times by the time she was Madison's age, but I think Madison having seen all the movies first reduced her curiosity about the books. That's a little sad, but no big deal now that she's getting into them. She was more of a Rick Riordan/Percy Jackson gal for years, and has read just about every book that man has ever written.

Kylie is even more out of control with her reading. She reads 2 or 3 books a week, can never get enough, and even gets a lot of free ARCs from her friends, The Bookanistas, because they love to hear what an actual young adult thinks about YA lit.

Point is I'm one damn proud father.

Personally I'm reading a lot more lately too. I'm actually currently reading 5 books. I'm reading Matched, by Allie Condie, during my lunch breaks at work. I'm reading a novel by a friend that has not been named yet but will be released this year (don't ask, because it's a seekrit) while I sit on hold on the phone at work (which is often). I'm listening to the audio book of A Song of Ice and Fire, A Game of Thrones, book one, by George R.R. Martin while in the car and while I do the mundane part of my job. I'm technically reading The Shard, by my critique partner, Ted Cross, but we're actually taking a break right now because he is on vacation. Then finally, when I lie in bed at night, I'm reading No Country for Old Men, by Cormac McCarthy.

I've always loved to read, but I've never been the fastest reader (unlike my kids). I usually only read around 30 books a year, on a good year, so this is actually a lot of reading for me, but I'm enjoying it immensely nonetheless. And the best part? So far this year I have worked on my the re-write of my novel every single week day. With the NFL playoffs looming there won't be much weekend writing for a few weeks, but so far it's looking like 2011 is going to be a great year in our house.

What are you all reading right now?

Vision Quests

So I Friday I asked you guys what you thought your Patronus would be, and we discussed Spirit Animals a little bit. I know I promised to break down the little that I know about them, but before I can even do that I have to talk about the Vision Quest.

The Vision Quest is a somewhat nebulous thing, and the traditions can vary a great deal from culture to culture, but I think it is summarized well at the Crystal Links article here, which I will borrow from:

A vision quest is a rite of passage, similiar to an initiation, in some Native American cultures. It is a turning point in life taken before puberty to find oneself and the intended spiritual and life direction. When an older child is ready, he or she will go on a personal, spiritual quest alone in the wilderness, often in conjunction with a period of fasting. This usually lasts for a number of days while the child is tuned into the spirit world. Usually, a Guardian animal will come in a vision or dream, and the child's life direction will appear at some point. The child returns to the tribe, and once the child has grown, will pursue that direction in life. After a vision quest, the child may apprentice an adult in the tribe of the shown direction (Medicine Man, boatmaker, etc).


I don't want to disrespect the tradition or culture behind these ideas in any way, so I'm not going to pretend that what I experienced should be considered as powerful as a true Vision Quest, but it was important experience for me as a young man, so I will share some of it with you.

When I was 16 I was sent away to reform school in northern Idaho. My mom had died when I was 11 and my dad was out of the picture. I had been living with my aunt and uncle and had become quite a troublemaker, so they sent me away to school. The place I went had some really horrible aspects, but it also had some really amazing ones.

One of the things I loved the most was all the wilderness survival skills they taught us, and how they incorporated lots of Native American traditions into the lessons. We had a sweat lodge on campus, also known as a Medicine Lodge, which is essentially just a natural sauna. There were a lot of funs nights getting really hot in the sweat, and then jumping in the lake. We also had some Totem Poles around a giant fire pit, where we sometimes conducted ceremonies like the Sage Rub.

At one point in my stay there, I spent 6 weeks living out of a backpack and a tent in the Cabinet Mountains in western Montana. It was one of the most beautiful experiences of my life. While on that journey we took part in our own version of a Vision Quest. Traditionally, a Vision Quest is carried out by a young person, usually around puberty, when it is time for them to find their place in the tribe. They will usually go out on their own into the wilderness, and either travel or camp on their own, often fasting and going without sleep for days. It is during this period in which the young person is usually visited by visions, often including the appearance of a Spirit Guide, also known as a Spirit Animal, or Totem Animal. Hence the term Vision Quest.

Of course Modern Medicine knows that the stress caused by sleep deprivation and hunger can often be enough to trigger hallucinations, depending on the length and severity of the stress. In many Meso-American tribal cultures these hallucinations are considered holy, which is why certain tribes take peyote, or hallucinogenic mushrooms.

We didn't do any of that, obviously, but we did all go onto what they called "solos" where each student set up their own camp, and lived by themselves for several days. We had to build our own lean-tos, and we were issued a big bag of trail mix, so we didn't actually fast completely, but we did go without regular meals. They didn't tell us to go without sleep, but the counselor who set me up did share with me about his knowledge of traditional Vision Quests, and he explained that if I chose to stay up and meditate, or go walking around, or write in my journal, I might have a more spiritual awakening than if I didn't. It was not required, but it was encouraged.

I'm not going to go into a whole lot of detail here, because this was a really personal experience for me, but it should suffice to say that I did not stay up or fast long enough to hallucinate, walk on water, or have an out of body experience, but I did eventually pass out in my sleeping bag, where I dreamed about being visited by a Cougar-ess who could talk, and sounded like my mom.

I'm sure the power of suggestion was heavily at work here, and I'm not going to speculate about the psychological aspects of this kind of thing, but it was all pretty cool for me, and makes for a great story.

Be sure to come back tomorrow for more on Spirit Animals, and some of the symbolism behind them!

Step Nine

Hi. My name is Matthew and I'm a blogaholic.

Beneath everything else this is a blog for writers. The idea behind it all is to show other novice writers great examples of query letters - ones that worked, and ones that didn't. But that being said I really love it that I can spew about travel, sushi, TV, and books, or even other inane personal stuff, and you people will still laugh or cry alongside me (hey, I can pretend), and more importantly, still accept me for who I am.

Today I am on Step Eight.

Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

Last time I talked about the only people I had harmed through my ignorance of publishing. Mostly it's just agents who had to read my terrible queries, and my CPs who struggled through many awkward phrases in my WIP. I'm making amends to all of them by continuing to improve my craft. I read books on writing, and I practice writing new and different things, and I improve by critiquing others work, but you know what really improves my writing the most?

Corresponding with all of you, and talking to you about writing. About techniques you use. About how you stay motivated. About how you come up with ideas. About what kind of alcohol you like the best. About what kind of snacks you enjoy while writing. I give a shit about all of it, and all of it makes me a better writer.

Soon I may share about Step Ten.

Disclaimer: This post is satirical. It is not meant to offend anyone, or to belittle the integrity of 12 Step Programs anywhere, which have saved countless lives since their inception.

Five Cities to See Before I ...

So yesterday Ted pointed out to me that none of my destinations were vibrant romantic cities with rich histories. He was right. I called them natural wonders, but he corrected me, stating that 4 of the 5 destinations were actually ruins. He was right again.

So today I am going to cover 5 cities that I feel I must see before I ... hit the NY times best seller list (thanks Nate). Okay, maybe shortly after, but that's not the point! To the cities!

London

Ding! If I were filthy rich and could live anywhere in the world it would be London. No I wouldn't stay there year round, but still. The history. The culture. The diversity. I mean come on? Westminster Abbey? Big Ben? The Tower of London? Trafalgar Square? Piccadilly Circus?

What is a Piccadilly Circus anyway? Talli?

Kyoto

I have always been fascinated with Japanese culture, especially with the Samurai and Shogun of feudal Japan. During that period Kyoto was the imperial capital. It still contains some of the most beautiful and well preserved ancient architecture in the world. About 20% of Japan's National Treasures and 14% of Important Cultural Properties exist in the city proper. Kamigamo Shrine. Shimogamo Shrine. Nijo Castle. The Ryoan-Ji Zen Rock Garden.

Plus, Iwatayama Monkey Park. Look this one up. Have you ever heard of a cooler place? Nathan?

Prague

Prague is a central European city full of rich history, and according to Ted, one of the most beautiful cities on the continent, if not in the world. It's been the seat of two different Holy Roman Emperors, and has been the economic and cultural center of the Czech state for over 11 centuries. It is also host to some of the most amazing architecture in Europe, from church spires to castle walls, and even modern museums. There is much to see in Prague.

Plus some of the best beer in the world comes from there. Ever heard of a Pilsner?

Saint Petersburg

Saint Petersburg was founded by Tsar Peter I and was the capital of the Russian Empire for hundreds of years until the Bolshevik Revolution. It is sometimes referred to as Russia's most western city, and is a large port on the Gulf of Finland on the Baltic Sea. Saint Petersburg, also formally known as Leningrad, is home to The Hermitage, the largest art museum in the world.

Can't get much cooler than that.

Reykjavik

I don't actually know much about Reykjavik, but something has always fascinated my about an island in the middle of the bitterly cold North Atlantic, so removed from the rest of the world. This city is the northernmost capital of any sovereign state on planet Earth. Ted also names it as one of the most interesting cities in the world, and Ted knows, he's pretty much my go to guy on all things international.

Besides, who doesn't like Bjork?

So that's it. Man these posts take a long time to put together. Whew. So what are your dream cities to visit? You can steal some of mine, and you don't have to come up with five.

Ten Places to See Before I ...

Josin's comment on yesterday's post about the photo of Nathan got me thinking. In it he is standing in the foreground with beautiful Machu Picchu in the background. That is absolutely one of the places I want to see before I ... evolve into pure energy, or get bitten by flesh eating zombies.

Hey! It could happen.

So in light of yesterday's heavy post, today's is going to be something a little more fun, with photos! And maybe a double rainbow for good measure. Okay, maybe not. So without further ado here are ten places I would really love to visit, in no particular order (excpet for Machu Picchu being first, because it sort of brought this whole thing up):

P.S. I'm going to be stealing summaries of these places from Wikipedia because I don't have time to write my own, and just in case one of you hasn't heard of one of these places. I'll link to the article for credit and so you can read more if you like.

Machu Picchu

Machu Picchu (Quechua: Machu Pikchu) – "Old Mountain", pronounced [ˈmɑtʃu ˈpixtʃu]) – is a pre-Columbian 15th-century Inca site located 2,430 metres (7,970 ft) above sea level.^[1][2] It is situated on a mountain ridge above the Urubamba Valley in Peru, which is 80 kilometres (50 mi) northwest of Cuzco and through which the Urubamba River flows. Most archaeologists believe that Machu Picchu was built as an estate for the Inca emperor Pachacuti (1438–1472). Often referred to as "The Lost City of the Incas", it is perhaps the most familiar icon of the Inca World.

Angkor Wat

Angkor Wat (Khmer: អង្គរវត្ត) is a temple complex at Angkor, Cambodia, built for the king Suryavarman II in the early 12th century as his state temple and capital city. As the best-preserved temple at the site, it is the only one to have remained a significant religious centre since its foundation — first Hindu, dedicated to the god Vishnu, then Buddhist. It is the world's largest religious building.^[1] The temple is at the top of the high classical style of Khmer architecture. It has become a symbol of Cambodia, appearing on its national flag, and it is the country's prime attraction for visitors.

Wudang Mountain

The Wudang Mountains (simplified Chinese: 武当山; traditional Chinese: 武當山; pinyin: Wǔdāng Shān), also known as Wu Tang Shan or simply Wudang, are a small mountain range in the northwestern part of Hubei Province of People's Republic of China, just to the south of the city of Shiyan.

In years past, the mountains of Wudang were known for the many Taoist monasteries to be found there, monasteries which became known as an academic centre for the research, teaching and practice of meditation, Chinese martial arts, traditional Chinese medicine, Taoist agriculture practices and related arts.

Victoria Falls

The Victoria Falls or Mosi-oa-Tunya (the Smoke that Thunders) is a waterfall located in southern Africa on the Zambezi River between the countries of Zambia and Zimbabwe. The falls are some of the largest in the world.

Mesa Verde

Mesa Verde National Park is a U.S. National Park and UNESCO World Heritage Site located in Montezuma County, Colorado, United States. It was created in 1906 to protect some of the best preserved cliff dwellings in the world. The park occupies 81.4 square miles (211 km²) (211 square kilometers) near the Four Corners and features numerous ruins of homes and villages built by the Ancestral Puebloan people, sometimes called the Anasazi.

Okay. Dude, I'm cutting this to five. This is taking way too long. Maybe I'll do five more tomorrow. Any places you'd like to see?

A Bittersweet Goodbye.

I really wanted to write about this yesterday, but there was no time between work and family. That's okay. What I have to say will mean just as much today.

As I'm sure most of you have already heard, Nathan Bransford, AKA Agent Orange, and sometimes known around here on the QQQE as Him, is leaving agenting.


When I first read Nathan's post about his decision to move on I was devastated. It hit me like a ton of e-readers. You might wonder why it would matter so much to me. You might ask yourself why would I take it personally. To understand that you would have to know more about my story. And I don't mean the story that I'm writing. I mean my story.

I won't go into all the gory details but I had a pretty rough life, especially in my teens and early twenties. I got myself into a lot of trouble but the thing that really matters here is that I stopped writing. I had always loved reading and writing and anything that was even remotely related to the English language. When I was in school I wrote poetry, short stories, essays, articles for the school paper, even songs for girls, and I always excelled in English and Literature classes, charming every instructor I ever had with my passion for the written word. Then after high school life got in the way and I gave it up. I can't quite pin down one single reason but I didn't write a thing creatively for over a decade.

Then two years ago the bug infected me again and I set out to write a novel. When the story took me it ruled my life for 9 months or so, pounding out thousands of words a day until I had possibly the longest first draft of any aspiring novelist (okay maybe not, but those of you who know me know my first draft was LONG). I line edited it and did some simple but lazy revisions and then jumped right into querying. I didn't know any other serious writers so I had no one to show my novel to and I had never even heard of a query letter until after I finished the story. I had no idea how unprepared I was to enter the publishing world.

Those of you who know this blog know a lot of the stories from my first round of querying. They are mostly pretty terrible. I got a few requests, and did hear some very kind words about my writing, but the overall sentiment came down to "you're talented, but this needs a lot of work, and no one can represent something of this length." There were also some harsher statements. I got frustrated. Eventually I gave up. I spent several months last winter angry and in despair. Something that I had always dreamed of, even if only in the very back of my mind, now seemed impossible.

Then one day last spring, just out of curiosity, I was browsing literary agent blogs. I can't remember how I found it but I discovered Nathan Bransford's blog. Then I found his forums. I read his posts about 10 Commandments for the Happy Writer, How to Write a Query Letter, Examples of Good Queries, and many others. I couldn't believe it. After all the cold cruelty, or at least professional detachment I had felt from every other literary agent out there, here was one who was human. I felt his passion, his optimism, his kindness. I was inspired. I joined the forums, posted my query for critique, did my best to critique some other writer's queries, and suddenly I was making friends, with other writers. Suddenly there was hope. I began to connect with people who knew what they were talking about, people who had the same dreams I had, and who knew how much courage it took to pursue those dreams.

I started this blog, inpsired by Nathan's desire to give back to the writing community, I wanted to help other writers avoid the same mistakes I made. I began by posting all my terrible early queries so that people could see what not to do, and then it evolved into posting the successful queries of other blogging writers I had met, some even published or soon to be.

I got to know Nathan better. He is a well known internet phenomenon, and I'm sure he corresponds with thousands of people every week, but he took the time to respond to every direct question I asked him in the forums, even if they were just links to stupid stuff on the internet. Eventually I found the courage to email him directly, and we developed an online acquaintance, his graciousness always shining through. I became even closer with his right hand man from the forums, the sheriff Bryan Russell (Ink), who has given me so much help with my writing I don't know if I'll ever be able to repay him, even featuring some of my creative writing on his blog in the form of some flash fiction pieces (see the "my writing" page above if you would like to take a look).

I was full of hope, optimism and drive to get my novel published, and I dreamed of one day being ready to query Nathan properly and have such a brilliant human being represent my endeavors into publishing. So when I saw that Nathan was leaving agenting, I was devastated. I spent a couple hours feeling sorry for myself. Then I wondered about Bryan, suspecting, as I did, that Nathan unofficially represented him.

I wrote to Bryan, and we discussed it a little bit, and I thought about it more and I realized that I was being foolish. Of course Nathan is an amazing guy, and I'm sure that every writer he ever took on as a client would tell you that it was a pleasure to work with him, but really publishing is just a business. Your agent does not need to be your best friend. Any literary agent with connections, who is professional, and who shares your vision for the story you want to tell can represent your work. Nathan taught me that there are agents out there who are kind and giving, but he also taught me that they don't need to be placed on a pedestal.

I asked him once if he thought it would be appropriate to query agents using a little joke for my genre description. I was worried they would be insulted. He basically asked me if I would really want to work with someone who was that uptight. He had a damn good point.

So I've gone on and on now about myself and how personally affected I was by all of this but that is not what I had intended for this post to be about. First, I want to wish Nathan the best in all his endeavors. He is going to work for CNET, where he is going to help them coordinate a social media strategy. They picked a pretty good guy for that position.

Nathan is also still going to keep writing books, and he will keep the blog and forums going strong. He remains ever impassioned about books, reading, writing, and publishing, and will always continue to keep us all up to date on the newest developments in e-books.

Secondly, and truly foremost, I would like to thank Nathan for everything he has done for me, and for writers everywhere. Finding his blog and becoming encouraged again changed my life. I can't conceive of how one person could possibly find the time to do so much, and be so giving, and compassionate. He's probably too humble to ever admit it, but I believe that Nathan has touched thousands of writers in similar ways, so I just want to say that here is one man who sees it.

Thank you for everything you do Nathan.

Up with orange and monkeys, and down with mosquitoes and the Lakers!

A Humble Thank You

I just want to thank everyone for being so understanding and encouraging about yesterday's post. It was really tough to share that experience now because although I did used to share a lot of bad old queries on my blog, they were pretty much all put up long before anyone actually read the thing.

Now I have a lot of readers, and a bit of a reputation for actually knowing something about queries, so it's pretty nerve wracking to expose the sensitive, ignorant roots of the man behind the curtain. I mean the truth is the truth, and I'm not ashamed to admit to it, but it's a little harder to do when you're doing it to 30 or so people at once.

So thank you all, very much, and thanks to Emily for putting the whole thing together. I hope we all had a laugh, even if a slightly uncomfortable one, but even more so I hope exposing my mistakes may someday help some other writer avoid making the same ones.

...

Now, it's Friday, so on to something much more fun. Here are some silly neologisms. Some are real words with altered meanings, other are ... neologisms:

• Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.
• Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.
• Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
• Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.
• Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.
• Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.
• Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.
• Gargoyle (n.), olive-flavored mouthwash.
• Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.
• Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.
• Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.
• Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
• Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
• Circumvent (n.), an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.
• Foreploy (v): Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
• Giraffiti (n): Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
• Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
• Inoculatte (v): To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
• Hipatitis (n): Terminal coolness.
• Ignoranus (n): A person who's both stupid and an asshole!
  

No, I didn't make these up, but I stole them from several different places.

Thanks. Happy Friday. Have a great weekend!

Step Eight

Hi. My name is Matthew and I'm a blogaholic.

I love it that even on the morrow after election night, when I have so much I would love to say, but will not do so here, I can use one of these posts to make fun of myself instead.

Today I am on Step Eight.

Make a list of all persons I have harmed, and become willing to make amends to them.

Well the main people I have harmed with my writing and blogging are the literary agents I queried before I was really ready (see the label queries/rejections), who therefore had to endure my ignorance, and the other bloggers I used to bother with my shameless self promotions in the comments. So yeah. Sorry about that.

I won't really be making any amends to them. Except maybe to keep writing, improve my craft, and perhaps one day be good enough to get published. Maybe.

Soon I may share about Step Nine.

Disclaimer: This post is satirical. It is not meant to offend anyone, or to belittle the integrity of 12 Step Programs anywhere, which have saved countless lives since their inception.

Halloween Weekend Recap

I had a severe cold all weekend. No fever, but very sore throat, constant cough, and endless sniffling. I don't know what's wrong with me. I never used to get sick. Maybe I'm getting old. Anyway I said eff it and had a great time anyway.

Kelly and I went to a party on Friday night. No not a birthday party. A grown up party. With beer. And a band. It's been a long time. It was actually thrown by some friends from Kelly's work, but we also play softball together, so I know them too. They asked me to bring my turntables, mixer and some records. I played like an hour long set. It was really fun but I was really bad at it. All my DJ gear has been living in the garage for over four years since I gave up on all of that and got a real job. Still ... it was fun to mess around for just one night.

On Saturday we went to Kelly's mom's neighborhood. Our 4 year old nephew Bryce lives there too. I was basically bursting with pride until I almost cried because he dressed up as the cutest little Darth Vader you have ever seen and I am not ashamed to admit that there is only one source for his love of all things Star Wars: wait for it ... Uncle Matt! Of course he was being moody and wouldn't let me go trick or treating with him and instead he went with my daughter Kylie, but he made up for all of it with that costume selection.

The neighborhood is a really fun one where everyone knows each other and there are like several huge parties going on at once. I spent the majority of the night riding shotgun in my buddy Dale's golf cart, while 8 nine year old girls (including my daughter Madison) hung off the back and sides of the cart and made us stop and start at every house over and over ... it was a blast. We could only go about 1 mile an hour uphill, but it was worth it.

Sunday was not as good. I had gotten really sick by then so I spent almost all day in bed, getting depressed by watching football. Oh well, at least my fantasy team won. Both my daughters had friends spend the night because there is no school in the county today, and they all went trick or treating around our neighborhood again. Thank god mom was home to hand out candy. Of course after all the kids were done, there was the obligatory escape of the puppy and I had to run outside in my pajamas to chase her for 20 minutes.

How was your weekend, friends?

Technical Writing

I won't really be blogging today because I have to author a few process documents and workflows for the client who is in town. BO-RING.

It's not that I hate it that much, I mean I AM a writer. But creative writing is so much more fun than technical writing. I mean yes, it can still be work, and it should be, really, if you're doing it right, but it still can be fun too. Technical writing? Not so much. At least not for me.

I might feel differently if I were being paid to be a technical writer, but no, this is just another responsibility they're heaping on top of my normal duties. That's business for ya ...

... sorry to depress you all. I don't intend to leave you feeling that way. I want you to have a great weekend, so I'll just leave you with this:

So Yeah ...

So yeah ... I had a great story I wanted to share with you that I heard on NPR this morning, but I'm not feeling well and now I can't remember what it was so ... eff it.

Problem is I'm not feeling well this morning (I just said that, didn't I?). Don't worry, I'm not sick, I'm just hung over. We got some good news recently so we went out to celebrate last night, and I had a few too many beers. I wasn't like wasted or anything but the problem is that I work at 6AM, which means I get up at 5AM, and five hours of sleep when you go to bed tipsy is really no sleep at all. Your liver's working overtime and you don't get any rest.

So now I have a headache ... and I can't even remember the awesome NPR story I wanted to share with you guys.

Shame on me.

Have a great weekend though!

Step Seven

Hi. My name is Matthew and I'm a blogaholic.

I don't have much to share today, but I'm ready to listen.

Today I am on Step Seven.

Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.

That's the official step. I haven't actually gotten there just yet. I'm still in a re-write, but once it's done I will definitely query Him, Nathan Bransford, and ask Him to suggest how I could remove all shortcomings from my manuscript.

My biggest writerly shortcomings are a tendency to over-describe, which really fouls up pacing, and not staying true to my characters, especially in my current WIP in which I tend to inject my own views into my MC at times.

Soon I may share about Step Eight.

Disclaimer: This post is satirical. It is not meant to offend anyone, or to belittle the integrity of 12 Step Programs anywhere, which have saved countless lives since their inception.

Happy Birthday Lenny Lee!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LENNY LEE!

I'm sure most of you know Lenny by now, but if you don't, let me assure you that you are missing out. Big time. Visit his blog and become a follower, now please. It's not my place to tell you anything about Lenny's personal story here, but I will say that this is the smartest, bravest, friendliest, most inspiring young man that you could ever meet.

Lenny turns eleven years old today and he already wants to be a writer! How cool is that? He's already quite good at it and he especially writes wonderful stories about animals. You can read a beautiful post he wrote for Jen's Guess that Character blogfest, here. You can read the post where he revealed the answer, here.

Directly to Lenny (assuming he eventually finds the time to make it here, which I wouldn't blame him if he didn't) I would like to say, HAPPY BIRTHDAY LITTLE DUDE! You're officially not a kid anymore. Eleven is an awesome age and I really hope you enjoy it! I especially hope you have a great time with your family today and I hope you enjoy lunch and the movie with Alex.

You inspire me daily to be optimistic, to love life, to care about animals and the planet, and to be so thankful that I have the privilege to write.

THANKS SO MUCH FOR BEING YOU LENNY. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

P.S. Here's a really adorable photo, just for you Lenny:

Step Six

Hi. My name is Matthew and I'm a blogaholic.

Sorry I've been missing so many meetings this week. I've been really sick. Not like dope sick, but actually sick. I'm back now though. Hopefully I'll be all right.

Today I am on Step Six.

I am entirely ready to have Him, Nathan Bransford remove all these defects of character.

These Nathan jokes are starting to be not that funny anymore. Or is it just me? Maybe I should focus on re-writing my novel more, so that I can have a project that is actually ready to query him with. Or maybe I'll just keep blogging instead.

I've missed you all a lot this week.

Soon I may share about Step Seven.

Disclaimer: This post is satirical. It is not meant to offend anyone, or to belittle the integrity of 12 Step Programs anywhere, which have saved countless lives since their inception.

Step Five

Hi. My name is Matthew and I'm a blogaholic.

There is never enough. Never enough time, never enough posts, never enough comments, never enough followers. Each single one is like an injection of happiness.

Today I am on Step Five.

I've admitted to Him, Nathan Bransford, to myself, and to another human being (my readers) the exact nature of my wrongs.

- I didn't shower for 2 weeks when I reached 100 followers.
- I gave my kids pop tarts for dinner because I was working on the guest post for Elana Johnson.
- I fed my kids Ritz crackers and cheese from an aerosol can because I was working on the guest post for Lisa and Laura Roecker.
- I cried and ate ice cream and took too many muscle relaxers when no one read any of my posts for the first week.
- I laid in bed for weeks when I got hard to swallow feedback about my novel. I neglected hygiene, parenting, taking the dog out and going to work for so long I developed bed sores and my leg muscles atrophied.

Soon I may share about Step Six.

Disclaimer: This post is satirical. It is not meant to offend anyone, or to belittle the integrity of 12 Step Programs anywhere, which have saved countless lives since their inception.

Anime Weekend Atlanta

So this weekend, on Saturday, I took my eldest daughter Kylie down to the Cobb Galleria Center just outside Atlanta for the convention called Anime Weekend Atlanta. My daughter is obsessed with all things Japanese, but especially Anime (animated films from Japan) and Manga (graphic novels from Japan).

Personally I love Japanese culture, and even incorporate some of it into my current WIP (like Aikido, a martial art, Kenjutsu, another martial art, Calligraphy, the ancient form of writing known as Kanji, and Zen Buddhism). However, this kind of nerd fest would not normally be my thing (I rock my nerd card proudly, I'm just shy and afraid dork overload), but I went anyway, because I love my daughter, she had been planning on attending for weeks, and her friend and friend's mother had bailed on her.

So we gathered our cash, printed our registration forms, loaded the Honda and hit the road. We drove 30 minutes or so to Atlanta, found the convention, parked at the top of a huge garage and headed in. Things got weird pretty quickly.

I'll share some photos we took at the event with you all. It won't be quite as awesome as Shannon Shame, but it will have to do.

This was taken soon after we arrived. That's Kylie standing next to a young man dressed up as Aang from Avatar: The Last Airbender. Hopefully he's the kid from the show, because she hated the film.

Sorry for the blurriness but our camera is not the best. This is a young lady and another person of unknown gender dressed up as Naruto and Kakashi from the Anime TV show: Naruto: Shippuden. Naruto is Kylie's favorite show and she loved these characters, even though neither one is her absolute favorite.

This was just really creepy. Apparently these costumes have something to do with the video game Silent Hill. To me they're just gross.

This one has a great story behind it. The guy in white is from the video game Assasin's Creed. I'm not positive but I believe he is Altair from the first game, rather than Ezio from the second. The story is that we noticed him in the hall, and I pointed him out to Kylie (this was when she was still being really nervous and shy, and wouldn't let me take any photos). So he apparently heard me point him out, because he snuck up behind us and followed us like an assassin for a while. He freaked Kylie out a little, but then she laughed and let me take the picture.

The kid is another one of hundreds of Naruto.

This one really creeps me out. That's Kylie. She's wearing the color contacts that she bought at the convention which make her eyes look like cat's eyes. It is really freaky.

Kylie writes a lot of fan fiction. Her favorite stories are based on the Naruto universe but include an original character she made up: Mononoke Tsumami. She is a female ninja who turns into a demon when she grows angry. I wish she would write more completely original stories, but I must say I'm happy that she writes at all. Kylie spent her own money to get these things, and she scared the crap out of mom at home later.

Here she is with a woman dressed up as Gaara from Naruto. I bought Kylie a cheap knock off Kimono with a fake Obi, but she loved it and it was a great leverage device to get her to pose for more photos.

This one is my all time favorite. I'm not sure what these two dudes were doing at the Anime convention but I loved their costumes so much I HAD to share. For those who don't know that's Hunter S. Thompson and his psychotic attorney from Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, the film which stars two of my favorite actors: Johnny Depp and Benicio Del Toro. Great novel, great film, great writer. Hunter S. Thompson was probably not a very good person, but he was a great writer and you can't deny his impact on popular culture.

We left the convention as the sun began to slip toward the horizon, and guess what? We (I) had left the headlights on (the poor Honda no longer has a headlight alarm) and the battery was dead. Luckily we were saved shortly after by a young man who had his own original character. He was some kind of Wizard with an awesome staff, but we loved him mostly for his kind heart, and his car battery.

So that's all the photos and stories I have to share. I didn't get much writing done this weekend. I need to get on that. How did you all spend your time away from the daily grind?

Step Four

Hi. My name is Matthew and I'm a blogaholic.

I love bloggers. Nothing makes me feel better than introducing a friend to a blog I enjoy reading that they might not have found otherwise.

It's like a big fat crack rock.

Today I am on Step Four.

I'm making a searching and fearless moral inventory of myself.

- At first I thought I was such a great writer I would barely need to revise. I've since learned better.
- At first I thought I was bad ass enough that I could do it alone. I can't.
- At first I though literary agents were legendary creatures of might and hubris, inspiring fear and servitude. I've since learned that some of them are human.
- At first I thought that no one would read my blog, that no one would care. I've now learned that this community of writers is made up of the most amazing people I could ever imagine.
- Getting published is important enough to me spend years working toward it if necessary. I believe in myself and I will not give up.

Soon I may share about Step Five.

Disclaimer: This post is satirical. It is not meant to offend anyone, or to belittle the integrity of 12 Step Programs anywhere, which have saved countless lives since their inception.

Step Three and The Fair

Hi. My name is Matthew and I'm a blogaholic.

You can often find me neglecting my family, my job, and my personal hygiene in favor of reading blogs.

Today I am on Step Three.

I've made a decision to turn my will and my life over to the care of Nathan Bransford as I understand Him (see the forums).

Disclaimer: This post is satirical. It is not meant to offend anyone, or to belittle the integrity of 12 Step Programs anywhere, which have saved countless lives since their inception.

So. I promised to share about my trip as well. I will.

Kelly and I took our daughters to Minnesota over the weekend and first part of the week. The main reason for the visit was to surprise Kelly's grandma Darlene (the kids great-grandmother) for her 80th birthday. And great she is. She's a huge Vikings fan so we watched the pre-season game with bated breath when Favre may have, almost, hurt his wrist. But it looks like everything turned out okay.

On Monday we visited the Minnesota State Fair. The Great Minnesota Get Together as it's affectionately known (imagine the Scandinavian accent) is the second largest state fair in the country, after Texas. It is, however, in my opinion, the largest collection of deep fried food, on a stick, that you can eat anywhere. It is especially famous for Pronto Pups and Cheese Curds (I could explain what those are but it's more fun if you imagine it for yourself) but this year I witnessed some amazing things like Deep Fried Candy Bars on a stick, Super Bacon (on a stick, that's for you Elana), Hot Dago on a stick, Meatball Sundays, Pork Chop on a stick, Deep Fried Sliders (no stick), and many other amazing culinary ideas. But my mind was blown this morning when I heard a story on NPR about Deep Fried Beer at the Texas State Fair. Apparently there is a Heaven.

There are many more wonderful kitschy stories I could tell about the fair but I don't have time. Instead I want to share briefly about the book I'm reading. I brought two books with me on the trip but with the flight and lots of free time around the family I finished them up before we had to catch our flight home. I've been hearing so many wonderful things about Suzanne Collins and her novels that I finally decided to pick up The Hunger Games.

The good news is that the paperback was available even in the worthless little newsstand at the HHH terminal at MSP. There isn't really any bad news. I think this is great for publishing, but especially for YA literature. I have no idea what the exact sales numbers are for this series but it's nice to see a serious story achieving this kind of commercial success.

I'm only five chapters in, so I have really no spoilers but I will briefly say this: Normally I can't stand present tense, first person POV makes it a little easier to deal with (normally) but in this novel, with this story, it actually works quite well. The immediacy raises the tension and fits the pacing perfectly (so far). This is a harsh world, and a hard story. I don't know how common that kind of thing is in YA but I find it gripping and compelling. My own WIP YA novel is meant to be taken quite seriously so it is encouraging to see something that has some underlying social themes doing so well, and being told so masterfully.

I will have to check back in once I'm further along, but for now, for those of you who are all the way through with Mockingjay and all of it, is it really as good as it seems? As far as I can tell it's going to be a wild, wonderful ride.

Step Two

Hi. My name is Matthew and I'm a blogaholic.

I can't stop reading and commenting on blogs. I get a huge adrenaline rush when a blogger responds to one of my comments.

Today I am on Step Two.

I have come to believe that a Power greater than myself can restore me to sanity. His name is Nathan Bransford.

Tomorrow I may share about Step Three.

Disclaimer: This post is satirical. It is not meant to offend anyone, or to belittle the integrity of 12 Step Programs anywhere, which have saved countless lives since their inception.

That is all.