Thursday, June 14, 2012

Jackie Layton's Current Query

Man, it's been a crazy week. But I'm back at work now, and it's time to get back to our bread and butter. So here's another query letter. This one comes from Jackie Layton, whose blog, Back Porch Reflections, is definitely worth a visit and a follow.

Go on, I'll wait.

Back? Great.

Here's the query letter:

Dear ______,

What if a beloved member of your family couldn’t get their life-saving medication because of a conspiracy?

Lacy Williams moved to Lexington, Kentucky to live close to her diabetic grandmother. The plan was to spend a few days settling into her apartment before starting a new job. Upon her arrival she finds Nonna, her grandmother, passed out in the bedroom. Rushed to the hospital, Lacy learned her grandmother stopped taking her diabetes medicine, Diamet.

Lacy’s fiery temper is resurrected from childhood as she learns that a law firm contacted Nonna claiming Diamet causes bladder cancer. Lacy finds Blake Thompson, Nonna’s personal attorney, and accuses him of sending the letter. He denies the accusation.

Once the letter is found, Lacy sees the law firm is based in Chicago. She wonders how they knew what medicine her grandmother took. In her quest for the truth, Lacy discovers a possible connection between the law firm and Nonna’s insurance company. Even though it’s hard to imagine, it’s a clue she feels must be pursued.

Lacy begins a blog, Diamet Dilemma. Through comments left on the blog her belief in a conspiracy is strengthened. The only people she can find who received a personal letter from the law firm have the same insurance company as Nonna.

Trusting no one, but each other, Lacy and Blake decide to work together to discover the truth. Their lives are threatened, and others die as they search for answers. The conspiracy trickles down from Chicago, to Lacy’s neighbor, and a link to Blake’s law firm. Together they learn to trust God and each other to survive.

Blake mapped out his life at a young age, and Lacy doesn’t figure into his plans. He never knows what to expect when she’s around, but he realizes she’s brought life into his dull and predictable world. Lacy hadn’t planned to fall in love, but time after time Blake is there for her. If they can survive, they may find themselves facing the biggest adventure of their lives.

The completed 60,000 word manuscript is targeted for Love Inspired Suspense and is available upon request. Thank you for your time.

That's it.

Please remember: save your feedback for tomorrow, and be sure to thank Jackie for her courage in the comments.


Sarah said...

Followed. I think you're going to get some useful feedback, Jackie! So glad you decided to take this step!

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

I'll be back!

Stella Telleria said...

Sounds like a really interesting story! I've gother a few ideas for the query but I'll save it for tomorrow. Who doesn't love a conspiracy? *shakes head* Nobody.

Nancy Thompson said...

My mouth is taped shut for the moment.

Hart Johnson said...

TOTALLY believe this could happen. Pharma is usually the bad guy in my conspiracy stories, but I can buy insurance as villain!

Are we supposed to give query feedback? Can we? I'd suggest NOT starting with a rhetorical question, maybe giving just a LITTLE less detail on the quest to figure it out, and that Blake currently seems to come out of nowhere.

Hart Johnson said...

DOH! Erm... just saw your last line... yeah, sorry about that. (I'm really bad at rule-following--did you know?)

Michael Offutt, Phantom Reader said...

Hi Jackie! Can't wait to see what Matt has to say tomorrow but I will tell you that it's too long as is. I'm sure Matt will point that out.

Jackie Layton said...

Thanks everybody for your comments and encouragement. I can't wait for tomorrow!