Mixed Metaphors

I'm taking tomorrow off, because my baby is graduating from Elementary school (congraduations, Madi!) so today is my Friday. Therefore, I'm just going to hook you up with a little fun.

Mixed Metaphors are something to be avoided, of course, in writing. Unless you're going for camp on purpose. But outside of writing, they're a lot of fun to think about, and besides mixed metaphor is a damned fun phrase to say.

So here you have it, the internet's best mixed metaphors:

• We could stand here and talk until the cows turn blue.
• I wouldn’t eat that with a ten-foot pole.
• He’s not the one with his ass in a noose.
• I can read him like the back of my book.
• From now on, I’m watching everything you do with a fine-tuned comb.
• It’s as easy as falling off a piece of cake.
• He’s like a duck out of water.
• He’s burning the midnight oil from both ends.
• It sticks out like a sore throat.
• People are dying like hotcakes.
• He’s a little green behind the ears.
• We have to get all our ducks on the same page.
• I have a lot of black sheep in my closet.
• I'm sweating like a bullet.
• A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.
• It's as American as killing two love birds with one apple.

Anyway, I'm sure you guys get the point. Have a great weekend!