tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post4945017763956858955..comments2023-11-06T13:07:23.645-05:00Comments on The Quintessentially Questionable Query Experiment: Current Query Part IMatthew MacNishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03264738483763244969noreply@blogger.comBlogger26125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-69623970867635677162010-08-10T02:40:55.201-04:002010-08-10T02:40:55.201-04:00Good luck. Seems like you're doing all the rig...Good luck. Seems like you're doing all the right things.Robert Guthriehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15618840090348189477noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-43025481879511349492010-08-10T02:29:54.603-04:002010-08-10T02:29:54.603-04:00That's really good advice. I guess I can see ...That's really good advice. I guess I can see where voice is lacking but this is a HUGE improvement when compared with some of your past drafts. And voice isn't a make or break. I know my query is just about void of all voice but it still gets requests. I think the most important thing is being clear about your story.Creepy Query Girlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18115161057496086972noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-57120447787564576282010-08-09T22:59:10.353-04:002010-08-09T22:59:10.353-04:00hi mr matthew! what you wrote is pretty cool about...hi mr matthew! what you wrote is pretty cool about your book. i didnt know so much about how important that quary letter is til i read about it on so many blogs. i been doing a practice one for one of my books and its just like writing cause i keep changing it up. yikes! this is real hard stuff.<br />i hope you get yours just right.<br />...hugs from lennyLenny Leehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12822588007434789481noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-55991160199843133042010-08-09T21:31:30.686-04:002010-08-09T21:31:30.686-04:00I like it! I can't wait to see it grow!I like it! I can't wait to see it grow!VICTORIA SAAVEDRAhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10329745716789899212noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-32841382988116031002010-08-09T17:28:10.305-04:002010-08-09T17:28:10.305-04:00I'm intrigued about what they're going to ...I'm intrigued about what they're going to say...Bryan Russellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09555071335245492790noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-73060375581689916802010-08-09T15:35:13.596-04:002010-08-09T15:35:13.596-04:00hope you'll make some great contacts or get so...hope you'll make some great contacts or get some great knowledge at WriteOnCon ;)DEZMONDhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14127166104359407763noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-51994590775735099782010-08-09T13:43:55.132-04:002010-08-09T13:43:55.132-04:00I liked the opening, and the little bit of persona...I liked the opening, and the little bit of personality about getting permission to kick ass! The end dragged a little, but I definitely think this is workable. Yay for WriteOnCon!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17034419617457525778noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-48204470978085203932010-08-09T12:48:15.870-04:002010-08-09T12:48:15.870-04:00Not bad, but its missing that one statement that r...Not bad, but its missing that one statement that reaches off the page and grabs the reader by the lapels and pulls them in. Maybe end the last line as a question?<br /><br />I had my editor give my query letter a makeover and the difference is like night and day. Good luck with yours. It can be a frustrating journey but you'll get there.<br /><br /><a href="http://www.stephentremp.blogspot.com/" rel="nofollow">Stephen Tremp</a>Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-73890721573101130282010-08-09T12:26:44.308-04:002010-08-09T12:26:44.308-04:00Have fun at the conference! If it wasn't for t...Have fun at the conference! If it wasn't for the time difference I'd be there with bells on. As it is I'll probably sleep through most of it. <br /><br />I love that line about permission to kick ass. I think if you can get the rest of the query to pop like that, it'd be great!Talli Rolandhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04780882465745107715noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-37628004092635368332010-08-09T11:28:09.633-04:002010-08-09T11:28:09.633-04:00sounds like a cool story! can't wait to see t...sounds like a cool story! can't wait to see the evolution of the query!vic caswell https://www.blogger.com/profile/01218698236837610704noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-47581164040166477422010-08-09T11:16:52.706-04:002010-08-09T11:16:52.706-04:00This is a great exercise, Matthew. (I learned how...This is a great exercise, Matthew. (I learned how to write a query by reading them on blogs...I sure as heck didn't know how to at first!)<br /><br />I can't wait to see what you do with this.<br /><br />The premise is very intriguing.<br /><br />Shelleystoryqueenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07039684494823420722noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-31191670123966815972010-08-09T11:03:38.252-04:002010-08-09T11:03:38.252-04:00OOOH can't wait to see what you do with it! Li...OOOH can't wait to see what you do with it! LiLa helped me with mine as well! Good luck!Christina Leehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01799776834213400246noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-29802487908941051362010-08-09T10:49:28.525-04:002010-08-09T10:49:28.525-04:00Need concept Matt. I can see where it needs some w...Need concept Matt. I can see where it needs some work, but I got a clear picture of the story.Bish Denhamhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13359927719391990534noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-9229207772858479002010-08-09T10:45:38.014-04:002010-08-09T10:45:38.014-04:00Love this line -- Permission to actually kick ass ...Love this line -- Permission to actually kick ass is pretty awesome when you're fifteen and convinced it's you against the world --- totally awesome :)Jemi Fraserhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02214408467456320167noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-83792109687375576912010-08-09T10:07:33.242-04:002010-08-09T10:07:33.242-04:00I like your story concept, and appreciate your bra...I like your story concept, and appreciate your bravery to post your queries for all of us to see. <br /><br />As Julie Musil reminded us recently in a lovely post: Writing is many acts of bravery.<br /><br />I look forward to seeing the Girls feedback and your subsequent changes. :)Lola Sharphttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14394765053485642935noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-1423961153222672412010-08-09T09:59:53.718-04:002010-08-09T09:59:53.718-04:00Great idea Shaun, and thanks for stopping by! BTW ...Great idea Shaun, and thanks for stopping by! BTW your email address is not associated with your blogger account, so I can't reply via email.Matthew MacNishhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03264738483763244969noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-1901168244602616502010-08-09T09:57:00.284-04:002010-08-09T09:57:00.284-04:00Day jobs suck that way, but persevere! They pay t...Day jobs suck that way, but persevere! They pay the bills so we can do the interesting stuff. <br /><br />I use the first person technique in synopses. They're the most painfully boring things in the world to write (kind of like queries but longer) and I find that writing them in FP and then converting them helps me not fall asleep. <br /><br />The story sounds really interesting though. I definitely got that through the query. Awesome job.Shaun Hutchinsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01480241164653893038noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-52519071799869451982010-08-09T09:49:24.135-04:002010-08-09T09:49:24.135-04:00Stupid day jobs. I feel your pain.
Happy WriteOnC...Stupid day jobs. I feel your pain. <br />Happy WriteOnCon Day tomorrow! Looking forward to see the evolution of your query. :)kahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10789825860272178765noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-20909054369379615652010-08-09T09:44:01.023-04:002010-08-09T09:44:01.023-04:00I'm interested in seeing how it unfolds. Good ...I'm interested in seeing how it unfolds. Good luck with the contest!Lydia Kanghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00484415427764822386noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-67923457570999231052010-08-09T09:24:11.868-04:002010-08-09T09:24:11.868-04:00I can't wait to see it morph and change. I li...I can't wait to see it morph and change. I like your open bravery -- refreshing.K. M. Waltonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07167022736028223997noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-1998999232059351912010-08-09T09:18:16.113-04:002010-08-09T09:18:16.113-04:00getting that voice in isn't easy! I loved what...getting that voice in isn't easy! I loved what Lady LiLa suggested for mine, and I can't wait to see what they did for yours ;)Steena Holmeshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03585255306121495098noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-58658984795629043392010-08-09T08:32:28.137-04:002010-08-09T08:32:28.137-04:00It is a shame that day jobs get in the way of all ...It is a shame that day jobs get in the way of all of our interesting work.Slamdunkhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13087161268629251860noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-13798529819633607402010-08-09T08:04:30.249-04:002010-08-09T08:04:30.249-04:00Best of luck with the contest! Your story sounds ...Best of luck with the contest! Your story sounds cool :)Jesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14121018905141253640noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-49196154278567446442010-08-09T07:58:51.607-04:002010-08-09T07:58:51.607-04:00Oh TIM (!)I see what you mean. I think it's go...Oh TIM (!)I see what you mean. I think it's good though. I'm sure with a little WOC and LiLa magic it will sparkle.Candylandhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08956196611348299424noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5345890055658252124.post-26374426232889722002010-08-09T07:48:53.295-04:002010-08-09T07:48:53.295-04:00Agh! How many times do I have to tell you about th...Agh! How many times do I have to tell you about those semicolons?! ;)Ted Crosshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09022309459554237650noreply@blogger.com